Life After Pain (A Walk Everyday May Blog)

I haven't had any children yet myself but I've found that when I was growing up this tactic worked for me but also helped me become self aware as a child and adult.  There are children and teens that find it hard to open up to their parents and adults in general. This could be due to a certain amount of shame we are taught to carry with trauma due to victim blaming culture and the preconception that children should be happy because they are not burdened with the responsibilities of adulthood. That being said trauma can weigh more heavily on a child because they are still learning to become human and the weight of trauma is more difficult on a young person who doesn't have the knowledge and tools of dealing with things the way an adult does.  Trauma can also be more scary for a child especially if that child doesn't have parental support so if you are a good parent who puts their kids first then know that your child is in a better position than some children dealing with...

  I didn’t just say goodbye to my father one day and that’s it. I have to say goodbye to my father continually, again and again, every time I cry and I happen to be alone, I have to fight every childlike instinct I have, not to pick up the phone. Just the other day I was crying, calling 1800 Respect telling them how I was feeling so low, I felt my usual urge to call my father. I was vulnerable and a mess. The counsellor on the phone didn’t discourage me but she didn’t encourage me either. It’s a delicate issue and a hard position to be in on both sides. Ultimately the decision was mine but I was being honest with how I felt. She said ‘If you want to talk to your father it’s probably best you do it when your not vulnerable because calling him right now could make you feel worse.’ I then told her that whenever I’m not vulnerable I don’t want to speak to him. That was confirmation that calling 1800 Respect instead of my father was the right decision.  I know now after years of tr...