The Other Side Of Darkness (Repost WEDM 2022)

 



***Warning: This Post May Trigger Some People. If this brings things up for you, call 1800 Respect, Lifeline on 13 11 14 or The Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 or check out the helplines that White Ribbon lists:

https://www.whiteribbon.org.au/Find-Help/Help-Lines *****


As I have started this event there are things that happen that remind me that this event is going to be one of the most important things that I do with my life. It hasn't been an easy road to get here and I know every now and then I may get triggered or my abusers may still try and crawl back into my life but I know I am stronger and heading in a new direction.


The fact that these people will still try to destroy my life just makes me an even better advocate in the pursuit of preventing Family Violence and creating a space where others like me can feel connected and totally supported.So when I last spoke to this particular family member they made it clear that they didn't appreciate me and didn't want anything to do with me. Instead of letting them beat me down further with their verbal abuse, I blocked her. This was around July or August last year. Today she sent me an instagram follow request without explanation. 


So I thought I should break the silence and write about it as part of my event to show that even though I've come a long way, I still get thrown bullshit my way from abusive family members now and then and I just have to speak about it straight away, express my anger and hurt, release it creatively and then come back to the present realisation that I am wiser. These people don't make me feel like I'm missing out on a family anymore because their dysfunction and enabling of each other is more like a cult and not a normal loving, supportive and functional family anyway.


So after taking a picture for evidence. I deleted the request and blocked her. I know her dad probably encouraged her to add me because they're nosy and haven't heard from me in a while. I am not about to throw away my freedom and I know that they are just trying to suck me in to the honeymoon phase again. I am not just creating a new family with my partner. I am starting a community which I also consider a family. I want others (as well as me) connecting with people who have felt discarded, disrepected, and abused by their families so that Family Violence Victims and Survivors have a Loving supportive family connected by empathy. As long as there are others like us, we are never truly alone. <3


I've learnt that humans are social beings and we are naturally stronger together. This is not just an event for my benefit but for everyone who feels forgotten by society, for everyone who's fallen through the cracks, for everyone who just needs someone to believe in them and support them. This is an event for you and I want to give you my love and support because you deserve it, because I feel like you would do the same for me. 


Let's make the word Family mean supportive and loving people who appreciate you and want to be apart of your life. We don't have to have anything to do with abusive strangers, let alone abusive relatives. We create our own lives and our own families built on our own love that we have fought so hard to get.


May this story bring you strength, perseverance and energy to move through the pain into feeling the joy of life again. <3

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